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May. 2nd, 2009

fast today

so im starting the fast today
is weird just because i havent done this in such along time, and so hard cuz my mom had been like on a baking spree lately so everytime i enter the kitchen theres a new batch of cookies. 
but i need to do this...i love the feeling so much, more than anything in the world

i also love this:

si se puede!!!

May. 1st, 2009

stats

so i realize my stats in a post to anorexicqueen and another community are different than the ones i have on here
honestly i was just kind of ashamed to admit this new weight, so i thought i could say it was lower and change my height to mirror that
i realize now though that i sohould be honest about my stats and that lying about them means just not accepting where im at right now so yeah, sorry i guess lol

Apr. 30th, 2009

tomorrows food

breakfast: apple sauce---80 cals

Lunch/snack: banana and cliff bar---400 cals

Dinner: vegan nachos---500 (?) cals

After: vegan cookies---100 cals

So, total out at about 1100 calories, plus i'll go to the gym and burn around 500
Not to bad for starters, i just feel so lost without stuff like 2-4-6-8...idk why but that felt more stable than this...

i just want this
Adriana Lima: Super Hot in Victorias Secret Swimsuit Catalog | adriana-lima

it feels like a brand new start

im 150-155 currently
but 130 is so close, i can taste it
i'm scared to fall back into starving again though, i i can't start purging again
I just feel so confused as to whatto do and how to lose this weight...

just need to figure out a real "regimine" as soon as i have time

May 2009

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